1. |
||||
I rather believe you're about to be thoroughly rocked sir
And madam we’re a bunch of rapscallions who intend to amuse you
I’ve studied the form, researched the type
Pressed my trousers, cleaned out my pipe
Rode here on my penny farthing bike
I think we have something you might rather like
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
Pop your hat in the air if you’re feeling excited.
Now look at all you marvellous folk, we’re glad you attended
Step right up to the front for maximum splendid
This is the time and it's time to begin
Fix your tie, take a sip from your gin
Give us a chance ‘cause if you endure
There's one damn thing that I can assure.
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
(We’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight)
You’re bloody well getting rock 'n' roll tonight
Pop your hat in the air if you’re up for a good time
|
||||
2. |
Call On You
04:59
|
|||
Certain things are always impolite
A fella must never arrive for tea without an invite
But if you have a gap that you’d like me to fill
I’ve always got a hungry mouth for you my dear
I’d love a slice of your Battenberg
I wonder if I oughta
Bring some tea I’ve enough for two
And dunk my bags in your water
On Wednesday teatime
If you’ve nothing to do
May I have permission to call on you
I wanna find out if you’re one lump or two
Give me permission to call on you
Oh may I have permission to call on you
(It’s tea time)
If this is a notion that tickles your funny bone
Then maybe we could ditch your chaperone
Perhaps you and I could become paramores
I’m jolly keen to enter through your red front door.
I’d love a slurp on your lady grey
Are you home alone
We could sip something freshly brewed
Dollop some cream on your cherry scones.
On Wednesday teatime
If you’ve nothing to do
May I have permission to call on you
I wanna find out if you’re one lump or two
Give me permission to call on you
Oh may I have permission to call on you
Now I just want to know one thing…
Are you a loose leaf kind of lady?
I wanna call, call, call on you x7
I wanna call - woah yeah
On Wednesday teatime
If you’ve nothing to do
May I have permission to call on you
I wanna find out if you’re one lump or two
Give me permission, I would like permission
May I have permission to call on you
|
||||
3. |
Blaggard
04:54
|
|||
Late night Wardour Estate
I slip out through the back way make good my escape
I barely remember your name
Your face is just a memory and I'd do it again
‘cause I'm a blaggard and I no longer care for you
Even though you might want me to
Yes I'm a blaggard, I no longer know wrong from right
Just what gets me through the night
Yes it gets me through the night
Darling, here in the park
There’s something in your countenance, makes you seem a good mark
I'll make you feel like a queen
but when I've rinsed your bank account
I’ll flee from the scene
‘cause I'm a blaggard and I no longer care for you
Even though you might want me to
Yes I'm a blaggard, I no longer know wrong from right
Just what gets me through the night
And it gets me through the night - most nights
Your loss is my living luxury is the goal
Is it worth the price I've given for this lonely soul?
|
||||
4. |
Cthullette
05:12
|
|||
Hey Cathuy, when we met you seemed a nice, well adjusted girl
I laughed when you said that you were gonna take over the world
I thought that you were cool and mysterious, the day we met in the library
You said my book of dark incantations was the thing that had summoned thee
And when they said you were a dark one, I thought that meant you liked to fool around
Not that you would burn the world into the ground
Our relationship went south
When I saw those tentacles come outta your mouth
Cthullette
Cthullette
Well I thought that things were off, when we took a vacation
You insisted on your favourite spot, a creepy island made of carved obsidian
I thought that I had lost my mind, at the sheer oppression of it
But they say that love is blind, I gave you the benefit
Unhypnotised I saw you, demonic form full blown
As you laid waste to my hometown, enslaving everyone I’d ever known
The writing was on the wall
But I just couldn’t make
Head nor tail of it all
Cthullette
Cthullette
Now I lament the day that we met
Truly my greatest regret
Was to issue you forth, woah
Cthullette
Cthullette, you were fun when we met
but you turned into a demon and I’ll never forget
You ensnared the whole human race
And caused death and mass destruction all over the place
Cthullette, you were fun when we met
but you turned into a demon and I’ll never forget
You ensnared the whole human race
And caused death and mass destruction all over the place
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthullette, Cthullette
R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn fhtagn
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthullette, Cthullette
R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn fhtagn
Cthullette, you were fun when we met
but you turned into a demon and I’ll never forget
You ensnared the whole human race
And caused death and mass destruction all over the place
|
||||
5. |
||||
6. |
Queen Of Treats
05:23
|
|||
Squashed flies in their Garibaldi graves
Just don’t do it for me
Ginger Nuts, while they have their place
Just don’t go with tea
Fox’s Crunch, are only for the elite
Not the likes of you and me
Jammy rings, why they’re tarts for the bees
I know you’ll agree
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the biscuit queen
All hail the Custard Cream
It’s hard to imagine a finer delight
For me
Honorary mention to the bourbon
For it’s surely top three
Nice are nice but it truth be told
They’re just too coconutty
Lincoln, to bobbly
And Rich Tea go soggy
Malted Milk are for demons. For demons
Take what you will from the selection box
There’s no competition
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the biscuit queen
All hail the Custard Cream
It’s hard to imagine a finer delight
Sweet vanilla lady
Melt on my tongue
The snap of your Shell
Makes me undone
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the biscuit queen
All hail the Custard Cream
Now raise your hands to the sky and
Dance in difference to this delicious delicacy
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the Custard Cream
All hail the Custard Cream
It’s hard to imagine a finer delight
For me
|
||||
7. |
||||
Up from the beaches they ran
Well, I say they ran - more like scuttled sideways
To take their vengeance on man
For years of crab sticks and seafood pies
Crushing cars as they walk
Reducing towns to dirt and powder
Giant powerful claws
Mix us all into human chowder
Our bombs, our bullets fall at their feet
They laugh at these with menacing shrieks
Tonight is the night of the killer crabs
You know, you know
Running for your life from the giant crabs
Oh
Hide from the eyes of the Killer crabs
You know, you know
Nothing’s like the size of those giant crabs
Oh
Dear god, the size of them - they’re demons
There’s only one man who can help us now
You’re right - we must get to the Professor. PROFESSOR
No! I didn’t mean him
Hello, good lord you two, come in, don’t waste a second
Elemental Manor is the only building still standing
Never fear, I have a plan
Thank Christ you’ve arrived, you’ve come to the right place
You found me in time, the worlds in a right state
I too have seen these creepy crustaceans
I’ve been meaning to do something, see, I’ve been waiting
For just the right time, quite the right plan
Together we can fight if you’ll both take my hand
And while this isn’t the time to examine evidence
Best guess they’re the product of a mad experiment
We’re taking them down, and doing it my way
Before they all charge and run at us sideways
I’ll tell them to mess with man is a tragic mistake
Stand back and I’ll bake a batch of crab cakes
Tonight is the night that the people strike back
We’ll ride them like ponies, see how they like that
We’ll build a new world fight till we find cracks
You go first, I forgot something, I’ll be right back
It’s our last stand, we’re taking aim
We’ve only one night to make a change
After this nothing will be the same
Actually, I might be a bit to blame
Tonight is the night of the killer crabs
You know, woah
Running for your life from the giant crabs
You know
Hide from the eyes of the Killer crabs
Oh, You know
Have you seen the size of those bloody crabs
Oh
Stop it, stop it the bloody pair of you, this squabbling isn’t going to solve a bloody thing
Think
Maybe they’re not just cursed crustaceans
What if they’re some kind of distant relations?
If we could just communicate, we might not be too late
Could we be mistaken?
Are these creatures misunderstood?
Maybe it’s a reaction to this war we’ve engaged in
May they not in truth, be good?
Hand in claw, claw in hand
With a little bit of heart we may
We may not be damned
But have you not seen what they’re doing out there
To our towns, our cities, our people
Of course I have, but surely there must be a solution that doesn’t involve genocide
Yes I think she might be on to something there
Let’s start to make improvements
Instead of pincer movements
There are many things unknown
Are there colonies below
We don’t have the right
To destroy on sight
Hand in claw, claw in hand we must
Are you mad, don’t you understand
What this mad man has done to our lives
Honestly, I didn’t mean to create a mutant army
With deadly claws and funny eyes
You’ve delivered us hell in a shell
Their claws might as well be our gallows
Just give me one chance, I vow to sort this all out
Although the timeframe is rather narrow
Help us to communicate if you value our lives
But how can we ever trust him again
Since he brought on this darkest
Most crabbiest night?
There must be something we can do
Yes, maybe they could all be tamed
And then kept as a tourist attraction
Or maybe as pets
I fear the humans time has passed
This is our end but it's only the start
Of the day of the crabs
The day of the crabs
Shoo you beastly things
Oh my god - it’s trying to speak
MASTER
Master eh? Well - this changes everything
|
||||
8. |
||||
Getting bored with this fuzz on my lip
I take a notion that I should strip it
To the barber shop double quick - oh yeah
That’s when I see the lady passing by
Tight black corset and a bustle to die for
I see my mistake as she catches my eye - oh yeah
And she says
How can I love you with that
clean upper lip
It’s just not done
Please, forgive me if I come off crass
I could never love a man without a moustache
You might be handsome, but you’re not too flash
And I could never love a man without a moustache
So listen, this is your cautionary twist
There’s a sacred bond ‘twixt a man and his whiskers
It’s not temporary, not just hair today
I recommend a cover up of fuzz
Waxed up, drop down or even a toothbrush
But heed my advice if you don’t want to hear them say
How can I love you with that
clean upper lip
It’s just not done
Please, forgive me if I come off crass
I could never love a man without a moustache
You might be handsome, but you’re not too flash
And I could never love a man without a moustache
Billy Dee Williams, Tom Selleck, Sam Elliott, Burt Reynolds, Richard Prior, Vincent Price, Nikola Tesla, Nick Offerman, Ned Flanders, Frank Zappa, Super Mario, Eddie Murphy, Freddie Mercury
Please, forgive me if I come off crass
I could never love a man without a moustache
You might be handsome, but you’re not too flash
And I could never love a man without a moustache
Please, forgive me if I come off crass
I could never love a man without a moustache
You might be handsome, but you’re not too flash
And I could never love a man without a moustache
|
||||
9. |
||||
10. |
Maketh The Man
07:51
|
|||
They say I came with arms outstretched
One from North, the other West
Sudden jolts to my surprise
Woke the fire behind these eyes
Rise Up, Rise Up
Though you gave me life
Lives don’t sail as planned
I’d urge you understand
Manners do not maketh the man
Manners did not maketh this man
And now, in starlight only can I flee
The evils of the day
From those who seek to shatter
Innocence with glee
Only blind men ever truly see
And vows you take upon the morning light
Mock the effort of our history
One thousand crooked stitches
Tracked upon my heart
A mirror would you make me
Rise Up, Rise Up
Though you gave me life
Lives don’t sail as planned
I’d urge you understand
Manners do not maketh the man
Manners do not maketh...
Look at the way they betray just on hearsay
Blood of your blood runs cold
And they look the other way
If you take from my table, I'll take from your bleeding heart
And together we will freeze my love, on our knees
Cover up your eyes
We return as one
Though you gave me life
Lives don’t sail as planned
I know you understand
I’d urge you understand
Rise Up, Rise Up
Rise Up, Rise Up
Rise Up
Rise Up
|
Streaming and Download help
If you like Rapscallion, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp